Knowing how to emotionally prepare for divorce is helpful because no one wants to experience the stress of a marriage breakup. If you can reduce the amount of stress involved, it is certainly to everyone’s benefit.
Psychology Today explains that fear is big factor in stress. It’s the underlying factor that takes people on an emotional roller coaster ride. Even when you’ve been planning on divorce or have known for some time that your marriage was over, certain factors can produce fear.
Steps to Reduce Emotional Stress and Emotionally Prepare for Divorce
Here are four things the psychological experts recommend for dealing with divorce:
Create financial strategies. Divorce involves a financial transition, and the sooner you face this fact, the better off you will be. Look at the financial factors of your situation, work out a strategy and accept that you must make changes. There is no point in being angry or locked into a hurt state of mind. It is best to deal with the situation and move on. Understand that you will have new opportunities to create financial resources for yourself. Start getting organized and making changes to get on with your life.
Tune in as a parent. Many parents stay in an unhappy marriage because they fear divorce will mentally and emotionally harm their children. What harms children more than anything is being exposed to chronic anger or anxiety. If these emotions disappear with divorce, children are more stable. It’s important to remain empathetic to your children and tune in as a parent. Listen to their problems or concerns and let them know you understand. Let them know they are not alone and that you are there to help them. Also refrain from talking to them critically about your ex.
Let yourself grieve. Grieving means going through the emotional stages of loss:
- Denial (disbelief about the divorce)
- Anger (blaming the other spouse or protesting that you do not deserve this)
- Bargaining (thinking if you changed some aspect of yourself, you could get your ex back)
- Depression (wanting to give up on life)
- Acceptance (realizing you can still be happy)
- Healing is a process and as you go through these stages, realize that eventually you can gain peace of mind.
Seek social support. It can be tempting to isolate yourself and not socialize until you’ve completely gotten over the divorce. Sometimes you will need to be alone, but there also will be times when it is important to socialize with others you trust, talk with them and let them know what you’re going through. In doing so, you will not feel so all alone, and it can help open up your perspective. It helps to see a better future is in store for you.
Are you facing challenges associated with divorce? Discuss your situation with an experienced divorce lawyer.
C.E. Borman & Associates can answer your questions, help you understand what to expect during divorce and provide you with information to help you make the right decisions.